http://www.mssinglemama.com/single-moms/ Single Mom Forum for Single Moms en Wed, 22 May 2013 10:45:44 +0000 http://www.mssinglemama.com/single-moms/topic.php?id=584#post-2888 Sat, 07 Jan 2012 08:20:01 +0000 Rhiannon81 2888@http://www.mssinglemama.com/single-moms/ <p>Oh my gosh, I know exactly how you feel! I felt as if I was reading my own story practically. Im going to try not to make this about me as little as possible and give you my thoughts on how Im trying to cope. Ive been single for almost 4 years now, Ive been going to school for an associates degree and Im thrilled to say that I will be graduating in this Spring '12. Being a good single mom has to be the hardest and what feels like the loneliest thing in the world, but we have to look inside ourselves and find out what makes us really happy. If we don't know what that is, then we need to put ourselves out there a little more and try different activities. I enjoy meeting and talking to new people and random people. I like to listen to their stories because I get look at life through new perspectives. I know how difficult it is to try to explain to your son about the whole daddy situation. I am constantly having to explain to my oldest son why me and his father are apart, he doesnt understand because he is so young. I tell my son that just becuase it didnt work out between me and his father, it doesnt mean he is loved any less. I tell him he will always be loved by his friends and relative and I asure him of all the positive and good things we have going for us as family, and what's instore for us after I graduate. Then we do something he likes as family to secure that feeling of assurance. This is what I do with my children as mother. As for me, I struggle with relationships, dating and sex. Im not sure how to go about doing that as a single mom. I don't have parents or family who can help me out in the baby sitting department. I have so little time and I dont work either so finances are tight right now. I hope my words and experiences give you a few ideas. </p> http://www.mssinglemama.com/single-moms/topic.php?id=584#post-2712 Thu, 13 Oct 2011 03:06:07 +0000 26andsingle 2712@http://www.mssinglemama.com/single-moms/ <p>I so feel your pain. Reading this brought me to tears cuz I know how if feels to see that hurt in your sons eyes and there really is nothing we can do about it. I say this because I want u to know that your not alone, however I can give every little advice because I'm in the same shoe. I'm 26 and I have a 7 year old who has not seen his father in 4 years. They rearly talk, unless I call him, then he pretends to care. He does not pay child support unless its taken out of his check before he even sees it, or when he files taxes. But I don't even blame him, I blame me because I knew he was nothing before I had my son, but it still hurts when my son sees my on and off bf with his son and wonders why he is not afforded the same opportunity. I'm struggling with having a private life and being a good mom. My son hates my bf because he hates any1 telling him what to do, so I am never with them at the same time, and its hard on both of them. I know your tired of my problems by now but 1 last thing...I'm tring to inforce rules, but I really suck at it. Its just not in me! </p> http://www.mssinglemama.com/single-moms/topic.php?id=584#post-2711 Thu, 13 Oct 2011 03:05:23 +0000 26andsingle 2711@http://www.mssinglemama.com/single-moms/ <p>I so feel your pain. Reading this brought me to tears cuz I know how if feels to see that hurt in your sons eyes and there really is nothing we can do about it. I say this because I want u to know that your not alone, however I can give every little advice because I'm in the same shoe. I'm 26 and I have a 7 year old who has not seen his father in 4 years. They rearly talk, unless I call him, then he pretends to care. He does not pay child support unless its taken out of his check before he even sees it, or when he files taxes. But I don't even blame him, I blame me because I knew he was nothing before I had my son, but it still hurts when my son sees my on and off bf with his son and wonders why he is not afforded the same opportunity. I'm struggling with having a private life and being a good mom. My son hates my bf because he hates any1 telling him what to do, so I am never with them at the same time, and its hard on both of them. I know your tired of my problems by now but 1 last thing...I'm tring to inforce rules, but I really suck at it. Its just not in me! </p> http://www.mssinglemama.com/single-moms/topic.php?id=584#post-2696 Tue, 04 Oct 2011 18:58:52 +0000 Singlemom 2696@http://www.mssinglemama.com/single-moms/ <p>Well, I was reluctant to find a support group. My friend told me that a single mom support group would help me see that I'm not the only one and I certainly can find others that will motivate me and give me helpful advice.<br /> My story:<br /> I was young when I had my son, pregnant at 15 and gave birth at 16. Needless to say I did not stay with my childs father and he is not in my son's life nor mine. I am now 24 years old and my son is 8. My son was 14 months old the last time his father held him or saw him. They have the same name and share the same birthday (I know, I just have the best of luck. My son asks about his father from time to time or shall I say mentions him and it's hard on me because I don't really know what to say. I tell him the truth because I don't ever want to lie to my child and give him false information.<br /> Example: (This broke my heart) Me and my son went to lunch with My now x boyfriend and his daughter. My son gets this depressing lok on his face (the kind of look that only a mother knows that there is something wrong)I knew what he was thinking about and I asked him if he was okay. He doesn't express his feelings verbally so he wrote on his coloring menu that he wants a pool. Well of course i know that was not what he was upset about so I asked one more time and he wrote down Daddy. He then started crying, but he wont ever express to me what triggers his thoughts about his father.<br /> I know it's hard for children to grow up with only one parent and of course i still live with my parents because in this economy i cannot afford a place.<br /> I am a senior in my Bachelors Degree and soon to graduate but i get so stressed because of all the homework. I am a full time student, full time employee, and mom. I have help from my parents (they pick him up from school and help him with his homework, but i pay my way so please dont think i'm living rent free)but i still feel like im lacking something. I feel like I work so hard and I am going no where fast. Yes it's great that I am in school but that doesn't guarentee anything. I make 11 dollars an hour. My sons father is court ordered to pay child support however he is a bum and finds a way to outsmart the system. I think the most i received was 40 dollars a month for child support. He constantly drops jobs left and right.<br /> I know my story is everywhere and thats not even half of it!<br /> Any advice would be greatly appreciated... </p>