What are the chances that a mother that has had primary physical and legal custody of her child for his whole life losing it to childs father?
Here are facts in order:
When I found out I was pregnant ex said he never wanted the child told me I needed to have an abortion, then said I needed to give the child up for adoption because no one in his family, including him thought it was a good idea to have a baby, and he didn't want it. I gave birth almost 8 years ago to our child, he was not at hospital when they did birth certificate for our child, so our child did not have a father listed on his birth certificate. Ex decided to move almost 2 hours away then broke up with me. Almost a year after our child was born, he decided to added his name to our childs birth certificate. We got visitation/custody agreement done when our child was about 2-3 years old. In the order it says that I have primary physical and legal custody of our child, and he has secondary physical custody in the form of visitation every other weekend. I've had a few jobs, and gone to school to help provide for our child, he has paid the court ordered child support. I've lived with my parents since our child was born, until recently. About a year ago, I met a guy and we started dating, then got engaged like adults do. We decided to move in together, I'm not a controlling mom and my son asked to spend the night with my parents, his grandparents, so I agreed. A few months ago, fiance got offered a better job several states away. I asked childs father if I could move our child out of state to be with fiance and he said no. Then today, two months after ex said I could not move out of state, I get a paper from his lawyer saying we have a court date in a couple weeks and he's seeking full custody because I abandoned our child at my parents house because he asked to spend nights there and I let him, and he is saying that moving out of state will take our child away from everything he knows and family and friends.
My ex hasn't been concerned with our child, how he does in school, when he has sports games my ex shows up at the last minute only when it's his weekend to visit with our child. He has his first parent teacher conference with our childs teacher three weeks ago. Our child has been in school for three years. He doesn't call to check on our child during the week, he calls when he's walking out his door to make sure he has the right weekend. He says I cannot take our child out of state to visit family, but he thinks he should be able to take our child out of state to visit his.
Will the judge side with him and say that I abandoned my child since he spent some nights with my parents, even though I helped him with his homework and I fixed his supper every night? Isn't abandonment when you leave your kids and don't have any contact with them? Also, ex has never taken child to doctor, or gone to a doctors visit. He is supposed to carry medical insurance but he doesn't have that.
I've moved back in with my parents while we try to figure out everything. And I don't want to lose my son. He doesn't like visiting his dad, and has asked every other weekend since he was 3 why he has to go to his dads because he doesn't like going. Our child has come home with bug bites all over his body and ex didn't know anything about them, then said he wouldn't pay for or help pay for the medicine the doctor prescribed. He's brought our child home several times, including recently when our child has pee'd in pants because ex was in too big a hurry and running too late to stop.
What are the chances I'll lose custody of our child, and is there any chance I'll be able to move with our child? Fiance and I had plans to be married earlier this year as we were expecting a daughter this summer. But now life has been turned completely upside down. This couldn't have come at a worse time for us. We had our daughter last month unfortunately she didn't not make it. We spent last week making arrangements and having her burial, now this week I find out I may lose my other child.
I'm sorry if this is too long and doesn't make sense, or is in the wrong place. Got a lot on my mind and can't think straight.